Friday, June 25, 2010

How to keep your man wanting more - stay one step behind him

Hey,

Do you ever feel like you are doing too much for the man you are seeing but he is doing absolutely nothing?

Do you feel like you don't even know how he feels about you? How much does he even like being around you?

You are the one calling and emailing, planning dates, trying to figure out how to make him feel better, giving him what he likes, making him feel like a VIP.

But yet, doesn't it seem like you are getting the short end of the stick where he is concerned? Like he doesn't really care either way?

You are the one thinking of him ALL the time but you don't get the impression that he is thinking of you at all.

I remember when I used to strategically plan my next move with guys. I kid you not. That used to really get me teed off.

What you really want is for the guy in your life to think about you and put in some effort, right?

You want him to think of you and wonder about what you are doing, when he'll hear from you again and how YOU feel about HIM.

When he starts thinking of you like this, he HAS to want more from you. He has no control over it anymore. That's what you really want right?

You want him to be like "oh wait, I haven't talked to her in a while", or "I haven't seen her in a while" but it might just have been a day or two. Then he picks up the phone to call you and he asks YOU what you are doing this weekend.

Why?

Because HE wants to see YOU. And the best part about it is, you didn't have to lift a finger. This is how you inspire him to want to be around you. You don't want to be the one wondering if or when you'll hear from him next or if he wants to see you or not.

You don't want to be wondering why he hasn't called you anymore. Those days are over! It's time for a change. You can only do that though when you make him a little bit uncomfortable.

The key is to stay one step behind him but two steps ahead at all times.

All you have to do to keep him wanting more of you is to never come on stronger than he does. So for example if he says "I think we should see each other more often", you say "well, hold on, we'll see how it goes. I don't know if I want to see you more often". Of course, you smile when you say this.

This will drive him crazy because he has no clue what you mean. But now, you have him exactly where you want him.

But again, you can only do this if your perspective has changed. It's not about acting, pretending or playing games. Remember that men and people in general I might add pick up on the VIBE you give off and that vibe, aura, energy, whatever you want to call it, is all that matters.

The reason you can stay one step behind him and not come on strong is because you understand that he is NOT the be all and end all of your life and he does not need to be treated as such.

After all, you are just dating him. Even if you are his girlfriend...

So then, you can fully enjoy your freedom, enjoy your time with him, time away from him and remain OPEN to the idea of going even further with him IF YOU think that you two vibe well together.

See what I'm saying? It's all about changing your perspective and that is what many of the posts on this blog are about.

Alyssa K

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